I Get a Happy Ending...

Ok, so on Saturday I went to a preparation class for the essay portion of the bar examination. I managed to last the duration of this woman's rambling, vague, and generally useless three hour presentation. I can sum up the entirety of the three hours like this:

1. Answer the question asked and only the question asked.
2. Use normal speech and don't cite cases or laws.
3. Use a Conclusion, Rule of Law, Analysis, Conclusion structure
4. Under no circumstances should this instructor be allowed to lead a group activity more complex than the Hokey Pokey.

I was able to survive her comparisons linking taking the bar exam to participating in armed combat during the Vietnam War. I managed to remain seated throughout every single slide of a power point presentation that would make an MBA giddy. However, when she came up to me and scolded me for not following along with the power point presentation in a notebook that contained an exact copy of the PowerPoint presentation, I had to get up and leave.

Apparently, I offended her because I had failed to bring a pen to the presentation and was therefore unable to fill in blanks and write sentences in the way that she wanted. She borrowed a pen for me from a gentlemen behind me and said, and I quote (hence the quotation marks) "Don't make me come up here again." I don't think I made her come up there the first time. Although I'm pretty sure she was out of line, I could not disagree with the premise that it would be best for us not to interact further regarding writing or pens or potential alternative uses for her mouth.

Funny enough, the pen she borrowed for me didn't work which left me with three options:

1. borrow another pen and mindlessly do as I'm told.
2. brazenly sit in my position and "make her come up here" again.
3. take well timed bathroom breaks

I'm pretty sure that 3 was the right choice. I took more bathroom breaks than a three year old on a road trip with a 64 ounce "Bucket 'O' Cola."

On the upside, after the seminar I was lucky enough to participate in not one, but two of the type of experiences that make life worth living. I'm talking about something that could inspire poetry that would make Shakespeare's sonnets look like limericks written on a bathroom wall. Something that I would have sat through two more essay bar exam preparation seminars for, at least. Thanks to that person for my happy ending, no pun intended. Ok, some pun intended.